On Posting...

More to come on my love for dance movies, my sixth summer of baseball, and how God is moving in my life, as soon as I find more hours in the day (the hours that aren't consumed by thinking about Lost :))!! I promise Kat! :)

Lost in Lost

**WARNING - Don't read if you haven't watched the Lost season finale yet!!**

Wow.

Wow.

The season finale of Lost was one for the ages. I can't stop thinking about it. When I get ready in the morning, I'm thinking about the finale. When I'm driving in to work, I'm thinking about Lost. When I'm at work, I'm thinking about Lost. When I'm driving on work errands, I'm thinking about the finale. I can't stop thinking about it!!

There was so much that happened that it has taken me days to process through it all and I still don't really have a clue as to what is going on. But, since this is my blog, I'm going to go ahead and throw some things out there.

Locke:
John Locke being revealed as Jeremy Bentham lying in a coffin at the end of the finale, THE coffin that plagued us with questions from last year's season finale. I totally didn't see that coming. I thought that maybe it would be Ben in the coffin, but honestly I really didn't have a good guess - but I NEVER thought it would be Locke. And NOW, I'm wondering, is Locke really truly dead or is he playing some kind of Juliet (as in Romeo and Juliet) and will wake up once he gets back on the Island? Why did the Island "let" Locke die, because remember Tom said that the Island controls when you die?? Locke has a history of defying death (his premature birth, the kidney surgery, the fall from eight stories that paralyzed him, the plane crash, Ben shooting him point blank!) and so I think Locke is going to end up alive by the end of the series finale.

I also think that Locke was never supposed to the leader of the Others. I think Jacob wanted Locke to move the Island, not Ben, but Ben is so overcome with grief about the death of his daughter that he wants to do anything to get off the island, and away from his responsibilities of leading the Others. He is so hurt by what the Island has taken from him that he takes Locke's destiny from him. And I also think that Locke has been denying who he was always supposed to be - a man of science. But Locke has always wanted to be the hero, not the scientist. And I think he is so scared of being who he was meant to be, that he has always fought against it. I actually think that Jack is supposed to be the leader, if anyone is supposed to be a leader other than Ben, but Jack doesn't want to believe it and is so single-mindedly focused on getting off the island that he doesn't allow for anything else to resonate. But Jack's line of thought has mile-wide cracks running through it and we have seen how those cracks have torn him apart.

There is also the fact John Locke has changed his name to Jeremy Bentham. From one political theorist to another - one who advocates man's right to be an individual and own property(natural rights) to one who advocates utilitarianism (the greatest good for the greatest number, with the ends justifying the means). I always knew that all my education at UVA would serve me one day!

Jin:
Better not be dead. That's all I have to say. And Sun's cries of desperation still haunt me. She deserves an Emmy for that performance.

Michael:
I think he is dead based on other people's recaps and reports of Harold Perrineau's other projects. Which makes me sad. I feel like we got shafted by the non-resolution of Michael and Walt's characters, which were SO alleledgely important in Seasons 1 and 2. And to have at least Michael's part end the way it has, makes me feel so unsatisfied. "You can go now" - and I have a feeling that Michael didn't want to go at that point.

Miles, Charlotte, Faraday, Lapidus:
So, Faraday?? Where art thou? Did he survive the island moving? Was he in the vicinity enough to be sucked into the moving of the island?
Charlotte, so you HAVE been to the island before. How? Were you born here? Some people are throwing out the theory that you are Ben's girl friend from his Dharma days. I don't think that is right, but I might be wrong. But I just don't think she is his childhood friend. And I know there is a connection with CS Lewis, but I'm not getting it yet. I don't even really like your character yet.
Miles - you are weird, snotty, and I can't figure out what your deal is, but I think I like you.
Lapidus - love you, but I wonder what is going to happen to your character now. Should be interesting.

Desmond and Penny:
Desmond and Penny, thank you for that kiss. It was the perfect romantic kiss of long lost loves.

Sawyer and the rest of the people on the Island:
I wonder what is going to happen to you all. I have no real theories, but should be interesting to check in with our old friends, Rose, Bernard, Juliet, and Sawyer next season. I wonder if they somehow will join up with the Others.

The Oceanic Six:
Hurley talking to Mr. Ecko!!!!!!!! (One of my fav moments of the night, though I wish we had actually seen him :)). Walt returning to talk with Hurley. Claire's ghost (?) telling Kate to NOT take Aaron back to the Island. Kate slapping Jack and yelling at him. Sayid taking out a guy staking out Hurley. Sun confronting Widmore. The reveal that Sun blames Jack for Jin's "death". And then the final scene with Ben, Jack, and Jeremy Bentham/John Locke.

These are the thoughts that are running continuously on loop in my brain. Please, post any thoughts and theories in the comments section!!

(I hope you liked this Leah!)

"DeAnna, Gentlemen...the Final Rose"

For those who know me, they know that I have a love for "reality" television, with some of my all-time favorites being The Amazing Race, Project Runway, ANTM marathons, and The Hills. But occasionally, I dabble in and out of Survivor and The Bachelor/Bachelorette series, as they can be so-so from season to season. In fact, I can't really call myself a diehard Bachelor fan like some of my friends, as I pop in and out of dedicating myself to watching a season, depending on the quality of the editing and lascivious of the "contestants" (Bachelor Bob anyone? ew).

But Holy Cow.

The new season premiere of latest Bachelorette caught me completely off guard and has happily sucked me into a brand-new season of awesome Rose ceremonies and Fantasy Dates. It has been a while since I have seen such a cast of awesome reality TV characters. The Bachelorette girl, DeAnna, is a hoot - apparently she's a Greek American with a Southern accent, who's really into her family, and wears dresses that need to be altered in order to hang correctly.

The guys are where it's at though - from the science nerd guy who got a "First Impression" Rose (which actually was something new to me, which shows how un-dedicated I can be to this show), to the sweet oyster farmer who gave her a single pearl necklace, to the guy who jumped in the pool and then stripped his wet clothes off to reveal a speedo with DeAnna's name on his butt, to Sean "Rex Kwan Do" who roundhouse-kicked a lemon off of the snowboarder guy's head, to the guy who got rejected and then promptly ripped his shirt off of himself and started howling at the moon! I am not making this up!! I have never seen such a cast of characters. And from the season-clip show promo at the end, the editors at the Bachelorette headquarters have successfully captured a viewer for the entire season. It looks amazingly awesome.

And so, I encourage all those out there who have not partaken yet in this wonder, to tune in on Monday nights to see this awesomeness. I'm hoping against hope that the wonders of the season premiere continue into the rest of the season!!

*Sadly the video that I posted has seemed to stop working - sorry to those that didn't get to see the brilliance of it - but stay tuned to the Bachelorette - each week is filled with amazing clips!*

A Light in the Darkness

It has been a while since I posted anything on here. I was going to post something last week, but ended up saving it as a draft, because it was so dark and full of despair that I knew that what I was writing couldn't really be the truth.

Truthfully, ever since last Saturday, I have been on a roller coaster. I thought that my hopes for a new home were dashed for good. Then I found out during a meeting last Tuesday that the financial position of my company is a lot tougher than I thought and the tough times that I thought were getting behind us, are actually still here. It seems like a never-ending cycle of questions about where to live and what to do about my career - that I have been here before, over and over and over again. And all these things together spun me into such a state of depression that I literally went home semi-early from work on Wednesday and just went to bed and stayed in bed till the next morning. I hibernated. And though I woke up still in despair, this little quote came to me as I was getting ready to go back to work:

"The beauty of it smote his heart, as he looked up out of the forsaken land, and
hope returned to him. For like a shaft, clear and cold, the thought pierced him
that in the end, the Shadow was only a small and passing thing: there was light
and high beauty for ever beyond its reach." ~ J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the
King

I guess I'm not that great of Christian that a Bible verse didn't come into my head, but still this was God speaking to me, saying that this is only a passing thing - this time isn't the end of the world. And though it took the rest of Thursday to bring myself out of my depressed and despairing state of mind, I got out of the darkness and hope started to return.

Life at work is still unbelievably tough and it is only going to get tougher with the summer baseball season gearing up in less than two weeks and life escalating into hyperdrive for the next two months. It is hard not knowing what is going to happen next, but I can hear God speaking to me, asking me to listen to Him, to let Him guide me in this time of adversity and to start to really believe again the love that He has for me. I can be a slow and stubborn learner, but thankfully I have an eternal Teacher who will keep on hammering me until my thick head and heart start to listen.

Writer's Block

I have a hard time articulating my thoughts. Even writing them down, which is usually an outlet for me to express what is going on in my head, sometimes just does not suffice. And so, I find that I have very little to say at all today. There are things that are going on in my life, but I don't know if I find them particularly interesting enough to throw up to the whole wide world. But since I have not posted in a while, I'll attempt to give shape to the things and thoughts in my head.

I guess the biggest thing going on in my life is that I am looking to buy a house and enter into the realm of "homeowner". I have been thinking about this for a while, and have expedited that thought process over the past couple of months and have come to the conclusion that now is the time to buy, and I can actually afford to do so - which I didn't think would be the case. But it is, and that is really exciting. I do have to say that looking at the places that I can afford has been a little disheartening, because they all require work to be done to them. As I think about it though, it could be an exciting challenge because I can tailor this place to fit me.

My biggest prayer for this place though has been that it just not be for me, but that it be a "haven" for others. I love having people over and I want people to be able to come to this place and feel a sense of peace, beauty, and refuge. The fact that I can buy a home is such a gift, and I want to share that gift with others.

The other big thing going on in my life is a restoration of my relationship with God. I have done a lot of reading lately (Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, The Little White Horse by Elizabeth Goudge, The Life You've Always Wanted by John Ortberg) and I can just hear God speaking through the pages, appealing to my heart, and saying "See? This is what I want for you. Leave your worries, your temptations, your weaknesses behind. Walk with Me. Listen to Me." I also have been listening to John Elredge's podcast excerpts from his new book, Walking with God and those have been so satisfying and convicting to listen to. I have this feeling of being on a cusp, like I am not quite there yet, but I am getting "there" - to wherever it is that God wants me to be.

I guess I also have a lot of fear right now - fear for how time keeps slipping away (cannot believe that it is the seventh day of May already) and fear for all the things that are looming ahead, most particularly baseball. The baseball summer season always does a number on me - mentally, emotionally, and physically. Time goes into hyperactive speed and yet slows to a crawl all at the same time. People keep asking me, "you don't have to go to all the games, do you?" The answer is that I don't know - based on five years of prior history, the answer is probably yes. And yet, as much as I fear it, I absolutely love it. I don't have any good reason to love it as I do, but I just can't seem to walk away from it. Because somehow the love for summer baseball seeped way down into my pores and into my being. The crack of a wooden bat, long summer nights, lots of laughter, ammoral baseball boys, and a semi-command of the game and everything that goes into producing it, keeps me tied to this love-hate relationship.

The last major thing going on is the non-stop action with our new business venture, Signature WoodCrafters. If I'm not thinking about God, a new house, or life, I'm dwelling on WoodCrafters. I love being in the midst of this, and I love the potentials that this venture has. Things are absolutely crazy, but I would rather have crazy than bored any day. Check out the links on the side here for our webpage (which is a work in process) or blog (comments are welcome!) to see some of the new stuff that we have done! It is amazing what we have done in a few short months. And I can't wait to look back at this year and be amazed at all that I have learned and what we have accomplished together as a team with this new business.